The stars are out

So the sun has finally shone and the stars are beautiful this evening.  The day started not so good.  Selah has a cough and so she got up before my alarm even went off and that was set for 7.  She hasn't been napping well and has been very cranky and whiny.  Which in turn, makes me a bit on edge and cranky too.  This morning I went to a staff meeting again and she was the only child there.  I saw other parents there, the dads, but of course, the moms were at home with the children so Selah was all alone.  She kept coming out to see me and wanted me with her and I didn't even hear most of the announcements or important information. 

I had told her that we would be together more since for the last 3 years I have worked fulltime and she has been in daycare.  I chose to work in the Life Kids school, because I love kids, but also to be close to her, as promised. 

Anyway, back to the meeting.  I was feeling very discouraged, and alone.  I was the only one in there with a toddler and no spouse she could stay with, no friend to leave her with.  I got very sad.  So, during prayer I shared my feelings and the prayers helped a bit but I still left feeling alone and misunderstood.  I got to the kids school and was excited for some activities of painting so I made the copies and got the paint out.  Selah was excited too.  I brought my ipod and a dock in the kids room and the children and I got some dancing in which always lightens my mood, especially when they get into it too. 

We went home a bit early instead of sharing lunch with the base so she could have a nap and I wanted to workout when we woke up and she went back to school from 3-5.  I always feel so rejuvinated spiritually when I do workout.  We napped together, finally (after having to put a sign on the door for people who dont have kids and decide to knock loudly).  I woke up feeling great and ready to have an hour alone.  Then, I got a call asking if I could help in the kids room so one of the students leaving for India could meet with her mom.  I was frustrated at first but thought, hey, she is going out of the country in 2 days and is probably super stressed so thats more important.  Besides, she is a really cool girl!

So, we got dressed and went down there and guess what?  There were already 2 people helping so I didnt need to be there afterall.  And, I ended up talking to another mom who knows more about the kids room than me (obviously) and we got to share and she totally encouraged me.  Not only that but she has a daughter alittle older then mine who has been really wanting playdates because they have a new baby and she is feeling left out.  YAY!  She is super cool, seems very grounded and spiritual and Selah and her daughter had a wonderful time!  She said if I ever need alone time, she'd be happy to take them.  What a change from the morning, prayer answered! 

Its all new for me to ask for help or even voice my needs without sounding like complaining.  Its also all new to me to go with the flow so regularly.  I like my control and my schedule!  Ha.  But, I knew this was part of why I came here, I knew it would stretch me even more and make me more like my Messiah and savior.  I'm sure he had moments where he wanted time alone and instead the masses crowded around him, needing him.  But, instead of being frustrated, he showed grace and love and support to all.  I'm far from that now but I hope to be more and more that way.

On another update, Selah is adjusting well also.  She took a bad fall and hurt her knees yesterday but she is okay today.  We have princess bandaids, thanks to grammy shipping them and that made her very happy.

Thanks for letting me share :-)